New Fan Clubs

The other day I was working out at the gym (yes, Fauf does that occaisionally, at least twice a week) and this girl had on a black T-shirt with white writing. As I lifted those bicept curls, my eyes wandered from the instructor to first the clock (when was this torture going to end?!), then to the girl's shirt. I almost laughed out loud when I read it:

"Official 'I love Edward Cullen' Fan Club Member"

Anyone who keeps up with American pulp culture knows who Edward Cullen is...that dreamy vampire hero from the Twilight saga engrossing everyone from 5th graders to our moms!

Now I didn't laugh because of course that would have been rude and also it would have interrupted my regimented breathing pattern. I couldn't help but think how ridiculous it was. And I am sure that the girl really was a member. Then it got me thinking about random fan clubs I could join and make T-shirts for. Here are a few equally ridiculous ones I came up with (for anyone in love with Edward Cullen, I do think he's a great character and Rob Pattison pulled off the dreamy look in the movie very well...but I'm married. End of dicussion)

"Official 'I love Katie Marzulo' Fan Club Member" (our local kcoy news anchor)
"Official 'I love Vanna White' Fan Club Member" (I'd like to buy a vowel)
"Official 'I love Stanly Steamers' Fan Club Member" (they get carpets cleaner)